First of all, I just H A V E to say thanks to all those who commented, called, emailed, and texted me. It meant a lot. It feels so good to be loved and supported.
Warning: It might get boring and lengthy... I apologize now!
This pregnancy started out like the other three. I was nauseated, had lots of cramping, and bleeding. I didn't get my hopes up.
I thought it was the all familiar situation I'd already been in before.
I had an ultrasound at 6 weeks.
Everything looked fine.
We'd been told that before.
The symptoms kept up and I finally got sick of it and wanted it to just be over with.
I had another ultra sound at 8 weeks, almost positive that I had already lost the baby. I wasn't nauseated anymore, my cramping was going away, I was almost positive it was another loss.
It was December 23, and I was not feeling the Christmas spirit. I was down and out. We got into the Dr's office and I laid down on the table. The ultrasound tech said, "Now why are we needing to see you today?"
"I'm pretty sure I miscarried yesterday. I've miscarried three times before."
"Well I don't know what you thought you saw because we have a healthy baby here."
James and I just sat there. We had no idea what to think or say.
My Dr put me on bed rest.
Christmas was hard. I didn't want to get my hopes up. All of my symptoms were back in full force. I just wanted to know it would work this time.
My next appointment was December 29th. The day after our anniversary.
We had an ultrasound. I was 9 weeks. I'd never carried this long before. The baby was in there kickin around and movin a ton. James just kept giggling. He was just glowing. I was still apprehensive. Scared.
I asked if I could go back to work after Christmas break. He said, "what do you do again?"
"I teach kindergarten."
"Then absolutely not."
So then I was making phone calls: my boss, other teachers, trying to find a sub, my mom, etc.
The next 3 weeks I was in bed or on the couch. I'd make a lesson plan every day and send it to my sub. It was hard to be away for that long.
I went a little crazy, but I wanted it all to be worth it. I prayed. And prayed.
I pled with the Lord to let me carry this baby full term.
I met with my Dr again at 12 weeks. Everything still looked good. Most of the 'bad' symptoms had stopped. I was still nauseated and could only eat baked potatoes and fruit loops.
I also got the go ahead to go back to work. Luckily, my kids were going off track so I'd have an extra 2 weeks to rest and take it easy.
It's been a long and G R O W I N G experience.
I feel so much better. I can basically eat whatever I want again. I am so grateful.
I am blessed.
I still hold my breath every day.
I am 15 weeks.
*The story I used in my last post was one I found on a web site and saved for this very occasion. I honestly wish I knew who to give credit to.